22nd August 2005
Hi all,
As a married man you always want to get your wife birthday presents that she'll like, but it isn't always easy, especially when it is a special birthday and you want to get something a little bit more significant and lasting.
In a way I feel terrible admitting that. After all, I've been with Lorraine for over seven years. She's the person who I probably know best, who I spend the most time with and the person more than anyone else who I should know what to get for. And yet because she's a woman I struggle to know what to get her. What's more I know I'm not the only guy in this situation (err, in regard to buying presents for a wife that is, not my wife - that's my problem to bear alone).
So what on earth do you do? Well first of all you try and listen to hints, those made subtly and those made less subtly. All of which were in short supply. Not particularly helpful.
The next step is even less likely to produce a result, mainly because it involves me thinking about what Lorraine might like. I'm on a short rein when it comes to thinking about presents for Lorraine, given that I have a past record for going away from requests and only being successful about fifty percent of the time.
Beyond the statistical measures (or estimates, it isn't as if I've kept track of how many presents Lorraine hasn't liked) there is also the type of present which has worked in the past. Massages, treatments, perfumes. None of which are going to be around in another thirty years, unlike the chain Lorraine got me for my 30th.
When all else fails why not turn to the great fountain of knowledge? Yep, I connected to the internet and ran a search on cpfc.org (posting such a request myself would have been a bit much, as I've done it a bit too often lately). As has been the case in other instances a search proved to be very useful, to a point anyway.
To summarise the posts on cpfc.org led me to a very useful thread about what to get that special someone (apologies, I've obviously seen far too many Ocean Finance adverts lately) on their 30th birthday. The problem was that the suggestions weren't going to be suitable for Lorraine. They were:
- Champagne. Lorraine can't drink at the moment and she doesn't like Champagne anyway.
- Chocolates. Just what every diabetic wants to open on their birthday. It's a bit like giving a young boy a football and embedding broken glass in it.
- Lingerie. So I don't get trouble with Lorraine let me just say it isn't a good idea. Don't worry, I've never bought anything stupid - that's all I'm saying.
So there were some nice ideas but they didn't work very well. With nothing else in the bank I would have to think and get some ideas myself. It was never likely to work very well. Things like a domain name bordered on the desperate and irrational (Lorraine is a complete technophobe), while the thought of a makeover and photo sitting was shelved by the thought about how much these things can look very dated very quickly.
The next desperate stage involved me taking a lunch break from my work and looking in all kinds of shops in the centre of Glasgow, during which time I cursed everything from The Gadget Shop (for shutting down) to myself (for not being a millionaire, not for the first time I hasten to add). Later in the week I told Lorraine about something I had seen in Dixons while looking for a present for her. "You looked in Dixons," Lorraine asked, "Why? What am I going to want from Dixons?" It was a fair point.
To bring my quest to get my wife the perfect present I humiliated myself and did the ultimate no-no - I asked her what she wanted. The answer? She still didn't know. This was beyond desperate, it had become Mission: Impossible.
Of course like holiday packing and Christmas wrapping it eventually all worked out. I'm not sure quite how but I think the impression I made on my wife on her 30th birthday was largely favourable, and you can't ask for much more than that.
So what did I give her? Well if no sources were able to help me do you really think I'm going to make it easy for other people in the same circumstances? No chance!
Have a good week!
Tony
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