7th March 2005
Hi all,
You should all be very glad that Comic Relief does Fame Academy is on at the moment, because this week I am writing about it and putting the rubbish I was going to be writing about to one side (for the time being at least).
I think the celebrity version of Fame Academy is fantastic. Even if the celebrities were dull z-listers they still get to be shot down in flames by Richard Park, who cracks me up like no other person on TV. More of him later.
Of course there is a reason that the BBC have been asked to stop running Fame Academy. Basically the beeb keep making colossal mistakes with the show. In my own view these are the ones we have seen this year:
1) Inappropriate use of other show's ideas.
Yes, last night (Sunday 6th March) the final three had to sing again before the judges voted for who they wanted to save. Meanwhile just about everyone watching was coughing the words, "X-Factor" and trying to pretend that no-one else was thinking the same thing around the country.
2) Mixing up the panel.
Here's where the BBC have really ruined Fame Academy. Part of the reason Pop Idol works so well is because you always know who people are performing in front of: Pete Waterman, Nicki Chapman, Simon Cowell and Neil Fox. Even though Waterman's form has been patchy since the early 90s and Fox has no business being there at all they are still part of a successful formula.
Fame Academy has never had the same panel for two consecutive series, and for this celebrity edition they've really mucked up, bringing in Opera singer Lesley Garrett and the horrible (and ridiculously tanned) dance judge Craig Revel Horwood. Yes, they've brought in a dance judge for a singing competition. Meanwhile singing teachers David and Carrie Grant are peripheral figures during the show. How does this make sense?
3) Continual promotion of other BBC programmes within it.
Is anyone else getting fed up of all the "Casanova" trailers before and after each show? Honestly, there isn't a chance of me watching this programme. I can't be alone in this.
On the plus side there are:
1) The usual terrible singers.
Only really applicable in the celebrity version, whereas the usual version tends to get young hopefuls who can sing but are prone to "deer in the headlights" moments. As for the worst of the worst celebrities take a bow Jenny Eclair, Chris Colquhoun and the appallingly bad Konnie Huq. The Metropolitan Police are apparently going to charge her for murdering "Whole Again", and rightly so.
2) Some high-quality talent.
Kim Medcalf, Edith Bowman, Debra Stevenson and of course co-host Cat Deeley.
(Sorry if anyone thought I was going to be serious with point 2.)
3) Constant technical troubles.
Sound cutting. Microphones not working. Cameras showing nothing. Directors showing the wrong thing. The audio feed being cut when something juicy is being discussed regarding the making of the programme. People have gripes, let's hear them! These aren't always legal matters, you can tell by what has gone before in conversations. What is aired and what isn't seems very cherry-picked.
How is this is a positive point? Perhaps it shows that the BBC doesn't spend everyone's licence fee lavishly, running the show with a staff of YTS trainees. And it provides something to talk about. Besides that I'm not making any kind of sense (nothing new here then).
4) The one and only Richard Park.
I'm not sure I can put into words just how much this man amuses me. To be honest I'm tempted to use his own words and let him hang himself. However that doesn't really do him justice.
The cult of Park has grown over some time. While being relatively hard over the first series of Fame Academy and then the first celebrity series he came into his own in the second series with the wannabe youngsters. In the first audition show he produced a Connery-esque insult of, "That's the first time I've heard that song sung with no emotion." He then missed two audition shows before coming back to blast through the last audition show with a fresh book of insults.
The remainder of the series was dominated from a Park point of view by three things:
i) The constant labelling of James Fox as a "pub singer". This always came over as a bit harsh and he didn't seem to want to change his opinion.
ii) The hysterical put down of Peter Brame as "a bit of a rogue, a bit of a charlatan". It seemed so ridiculously out of place that I almost started crying with laughter.
iii) His ongoing feud with co-host Patrick Kielty. You could see it building up for a few weeks until Richard Park finally told him he was getting a bit fed up of Kielty's attitude and told him to "button it". Park looked as red as a tomato, Kielty shrugged, while Lorraine and I turned to each other and started laughing.
Needless to say Park has carried on in the same form. As I write I'm hoping that Lorraine hasn't recorded over their alleged clash on Saturday night that led to over 400 complaints, seeing as we were out and my Sunday afternoon viewing was catching up on the Palace highlights (I know, hardly a devoted viewer, am I?).
As I've not seen that incident I can't possibly put it in my list of highlights so far, so here is the inconclusive list of Park highlights.
1) Saying he was going to personally make sure that Kim Medcalf was going to be tucked up in bed at an early hour. I'm sure you'd like to do that Richard, along with most of the adult male population of the United Kingdom. Nice try, but don't think we didn't notice it.
2) Trying to make clever Scottish references with Edith Bowman but embarrassing himself in the process.
3) On the BBC3 show early in the proceedings he questioned Revel Horwood's place on the show, deeming that he was unqualified to be there. And so say all of us, but probably not as well as chereographer Kevin Adams, who called a spade a spade by referring to Revel Horwood as a "Pillock".
Other points of note:
- I do like Reggie Yates. He's improving as a singer, he's got a sense of perspective on the whole thing, he's made open "Orange" and "St. Tropez" references to Revel Horwood and he's improving as a singer. Plus he's brought "You Can't Touch This" back into the public realm, much to the annoyance of anyone who knows me.
- As Iain Dowie might say, "I'm not on the 'get behind Edith' bandwagon, I'm driving it!" Can't help it, I listen to her radio show, she seems like a nice person, I want her to do well.
Have a good week!
Tony
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