17th January 2005
Hi all,
For those of you who didn't know last week Scotland was hit by some pretty bad storms. The North-West of the country was worst hit, with some gusts reaching 124mph. Needless to say it wasn't a lot of fun.
With the storms due to arrive on Tuesday night I knew I would need to set other alarms in case we had a power cut. Come 6am on Wednesday morning I had been proved right, as I woke up in total darkness. No red digital numbers to be seen anywhere - our power had gone.
So picture me, getting ready for work, shaving with cold water by candlelight! Oddly it seems that the time you most appreciated electricity is when you don't have any. Shaving in near darkness isn't a lot of fun. Amazingly I managed not to cut myself - perhaps I should shave in the dark more often?
At about 6.50am the electricity came back on. As it turned out this was the worst thing that could have happened for me as I blew the candles out, reset the alarm clocks and sat down to enjoy my breakfast. Five minutes later the power went out again, leaving me scrambling for matches and trying to finish my cereal in the dark. Great, or as I said at the time, "G-mm-mmm-urgh."
Given the weather I gave myself a bit longer to get into work, so I left home at 7.05am. The drive into Motherwell took a little longer than usual, but on the way there an announcement was made on the radio that no trains were running. Oddly when I walked past the station the lights were on and there were plenty of staff about. Maybe they were running replacement buses? I really should have known better than to ask.
So off I trudged to the bus stop. I haven't taken the bus into work for about two years, so I was a bit surprised to see the first express bus go zooming past the bus stop with the driver waving to the queue of people. I carried on waiting, all the time getting colder and colder, slowly losing any feeling in my feet. Twenty minutes later another express bus came along, but along with it came the call, "Ten journey ticket holders only." Great. Short of sending my boss a text message with the words, "I'm trying to get into work, I might be some time," (it doesn't read as well as it sounds, does it?) I only had one option left: driving into work.
Now not getting the bus into work for two years might be one thing, driving into work for the first time in about three was another thing altogether, especially given the windy conditions. Here are just a few things I heard in the car on the radio:
"Don't make journeys today unless you absolutely have to."
"It's really windy this morning. My advice would be to stay at home."
"Please stay off the roads this morning. If you do have to drive give high-sided vehicles lots of space."
Very comforting, as I'm sure you appreciate. Needless to say I was concentrating as intently as I could at 8.15 in the morning.
Finally I got into Glasgow. Now all I had to do was find somewhere to park. Easy, right? Wrong!
Option 1 was a long stay car park about two minutes walk from my work. Small problem - there was a traffic cone blocking the entrance to the barely half-full car park, and an attendant behind the cone shrugging his shoulders and turning his palms to the sky when I looked at him.
Option 2 was a short stay car park the other side of the street from the long stay car park. Small problem - you had to pay the ticket machine in cash. I don't really carry cash on me anymore. I was going to have to try another option.
Option 3 was another car park just up the street. Up the other direction on a one way street. It was open, there were spaces, I didn't need to pay in cash! How much did a day's parking cost me? ?9.60!!! Next time the weather is like it was that morning I'll call in and see if I can take a day's holiday, otherwise I would need to sell a kidney to pay for the parking. Far too much hassle all round.
Other notes from the past week...
I got a good laugh out of Coronation Street last night. Some new creepy guy was trying to seduce Sally and came out with the line, "You're a beautiful and intelligent woman, Sally." What? You must be joking, right? And she fell for it too, proving just how intelligent she is.
In saying that, Corrie is still constantly delivering a boot to the backside of Eastenders. In the interests of being polite I watched Thursday night's episode with Graeme (my brother-in-law) and Sandra (his wife). When Zoe finally succumbed to Den's advances Sandra nearly went purple with rage. I don't blame her, if I had cared I would have been the same. Just another implausible sequence of events.
Incidentally does anyone think that the Eastenders scriptwriters and top brass are trying to be ironic with what is happening with Dirty Den? "You get caught being a dirty old man on our premises, we'll turn your character into one." That's the only reason I can find for the current plot-line.
Anyway, here's my idea on how to save Eastenders. Have Mo waking up in bed with a bruised cheek and a cut above one eye. She walks through to the bathroom, finds the shower running. Trevor turns round and says, "Hello sweetheart!" in those typically chilling tones. Back to the glory days in an equally implausible twist, yet also wiping out all the stupidity that has taken place since they killed him off. (Actually let's remember one of the great soap villains as he was. Forget I mentioned it.)
Have a good week!
Tony
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